Calling. :)

Alright, so I don't know if many of you know this, but I play the piano. I took lessons for around eight years and then stopped and just played off and on since then. I would play in seminary or institute and I was pretty good at hymns, I have never really liked playing in front of people because of my insecurities and nervous OCD tendencies under pressure so I never really worked REALLY hard to develop my talent. So, then I got married and NEVER played. EVER. I didn't even practice at all. For like three years. This last Christmas I was at church and the Relief Society President asked if I could play any of the hymns because they were desperate since our regular pianist was a no-show that day. I told her I could probably do it but to not expect anything too fantastic because it had been awhile...anyway...I chose a couple of songs, the first one went really good, I was surprised because it had been so long! Then, the bishop came and sat down for the lesson. I played the closing hymn with only one or two unnoticeable mistakes and as I was leaving afterward he shook my hand and said, "Sister Jarvis, I didn't know you played the piano, that was great!" I was like "Oh, thanks...it's been awhile...ha. ha." and left real fast. I didn't want him getting any ideas. After that our little family wasn't at our ward for five weeks in a row because of weddings and holidays and all that good stuff, but the Sunday before I got back the Bishop called and asked if I could speak. Of course I said yes and so I prepared a talk and was all nervous ALL week long. I gave my talk and felt like a million pounds had lifted off my shoulders...but then...I was asked to meet with a member of the bishopric after church. I thought maybe I was getting released from a calling or something so I wasn't too worried. But when I showed up after church and stepped in to the office, I felt that million pounds come right back to my shoulders and thought I would have a heart attack when I heard what the counselor asked me. "Sister Jarvis, I have a sort of...two-fold calling to extend to you...we would like to call you as the ward pianist and we would like you to learn the organ too." I almost barfed. really. it was right there. I have N.E.V.E.R. played an organ!!!!!!! I was like, "seriously? Are you being serious?" Probably with a crazed look in my eye. He looked a little scared. I just lost control and started going off about how I hadn't played in years and how I could only play a few of the hymns and blah blah blah. He was like, "it's okay, you can play the same hymns every week, we don't care, as long as someone is playing." That didn't really help at all. I was so surprised by the calling that I said yes and left. When I saw Jeremy and my mom out in the hall I must have looked pretty awful because my mom was trying to hold down a laugh and said, "it couldn't have been that bad..." I was like, "guess." as we walked out to the car and as they guessed I progressively returned to reality and felt tears about to burst from my eyes. I finally just blurted out what had happened and Jeremy busted up laughing. yeah. didn't help. That sweet, tender, loving husband of mine. I acted all calm but when we got home and I had Bridger down for a nap I curled up on the couch and bawled my eyes out. Jeremy just sat there...not knowing what to say because I was being such a turd about everything. I just kept yelling that I was going to call back and say "no, I can't do this. I'm sorry, but I just can't." I kept trying to think of excuses of why I couldn't do this, but mostly I knew I was just scared out of my mind. I didn't say no, I don't believe in saying no to callings and that is the reason I said yes in the first place. So, Jeremy gave me a blessing and I read my patriarchal blessing and I knew that this is what Heavenly Father wanted me to do. So I did it. I practiced for hours and hours that first week and on Sunday I played the piano, it went amazing! The second week I got a five minute lesson on the organ and that was it, but I played it on Sunday anyway, and other than a few mistakes and sounding a little "choppy" I did really well again! Thanks to Heavenly Father, I give all the credit to Him. :) Last week was a little rough for some reason (that could be a whole nother post in itself...), but I hope this next week is better. Pray for me. ;) lol. 

This was and continues to be an extreme testimony builder for me...I just remind myself that I can do all things with the Lord. :) 

Just wait for the story about last Sunday...lol.