BS in Psychology...I'm graduated!

Oh heavens. I do not even remember what happened in the last three weeks since I posted last! geez. I sort of started to freak out about three weeks ago and got really stressed out which is the reason for the lack of posts... The thing that was stressing me out so bad was that women's conference was Thursday and Friday last week, then we were supposed to go straight in to vacation, but I still had homework! I was like, no way. I just wanted to be done! So Jeremy and I tried to cram three weeks of homework in to a week and a half. We got everything done except a final and I had a final project to turn in, which I finished Monday!!!! So I am done. All done. finished. graduated.... .. .... ..... .... ... ... .... free. :) Do you understand how that feels? I have taken one summer break from college. I have been going to school for like 18 years straight, no joke, and this semester I was taking a whopping 18 credits while trying to be a mom and wife...ha. ha. (It's amazing how being busy helps you appreciate the freedom...) Thank goodness for Heavenly Father, that's all I can say. So, Monday, Jeremy and I took our last final for a class we took together which took me like five hours! It was ridiculous. Then I had to finish this huge research prospectus that I had no experience writing, so that was just a bit overwhelming (I will have to post about the subject of my research, it's a.m.a.z.i.n.g).

My family was playing games at the table where I was working while I worked on that the rest of the day/evening, I had a stiff neck, a stiff back, no shower, pj's on, crazy bed hair from that morning, a glazed-over look on my face, and mind exhaustion building...I reviewed it one last time, announced that I was finished to everyone, then I said "I am pressing submit!!" and started counting, "1....2.................3...." and pressed submit. I was like freaking out that the internet connection was shutting down or something because it said "submitting" for like three minutes, I just about died while my entire family sat staring at me, cracking jokes about how I would have to wait until tomorrow. no way. It finally went through and I stared at the computer screen trying to let it sink in that I had submitted my very last assignment. I jumped out of my chair and started screaming in a whisper since Bridger was in bed, dancing around like a nerd and pumping my fists in the air. I was literally like shaking and I felt like this huge weight had lifted off my shoulders. All at once the past few years flew through my mind and I realized that I can finally move past all that now. It was a really amazing feeling that I will never forget, it made all that school completely worth it to me. :) The feeling of accomplishment, knowing how much work I put in, and how much I gained from doing all of that, the way it built my confidence, it is unforgettable and I will never regret working toward and achieving this goal. ever.

I am not walking at graduation, I could care less about attending a ceremony, I am just happy to be finished! I am still trying to get used to the fact that I can do other things besides homework during Bridger's naps now...like...blog without feeling guilty. :) ha ha. Or maybe even....take a nap...that hasn't happened in over a year! I continually catch myself thinking, "ok, what's due today, tomorrow, next week?" "Where's my computer, gotta check Canvas.." or whatever...Then I remember! It's great. :)

I probably sound really crazy with all of this emotion about school lol. It's just that I have been working on this goal and waiting for this day for a long time, ever since I was a little girl I knew I would get my Bachelor degree, maybe more. After I had Bridger last Spring, I really wanted to give up, people kept telling me to just "take a break," "there's no hurry," but inside I just ignored them because it was too tempting and I knew that I was in a hurry...in a hurry to be a FULL-time mom and wife and graduated! It was hard, I am not going to lie. I would never tell anyone that school is easy, sure, there are some easy classes and once you get the hang of things it gets smoother and more manageable, but there will always be a few challenging classes, teachers, assignments, and tests no matter what degree you choose. I actually really loved being a student and going to school, I love interacting with other people who are interested in Psychology and that is one thing I will miss...school sort of forced me to exercise my mind and kept me continually learning and growing, pushing myself to do better. Getting an education can give this sort of...empowering feeling, and a feeling of confidence that doesn't come from anything else, which is why I love to hear about other mom's and women who choose to get a degree. But I now have to find something to replace that just because...that's how I am. :) lol.

Anyway, now what I am going to do in my spare time??? Well, I will be reading books to learn about something I will mention later. And most important I will spend more time with my husband, and play with my boy, of course. :) I love them. so much. They hold my heart and my very being. :) I am so glad I am done. :) Whoo hoo!!

This post is already extremely long...so I will post about Easter, research (which sounds boring, but it's not), women's conference (which was awesome), and vacation next time. :) I just realized how behind I am...